Children in danger: Mistreated and abused

With more and more families forced to send their children away from home because they can’t afford to bring them up, children increasingly are becoming victims of a once socially useful custom known as informal or “traditional” adoption. Sylvie, a 28-year-old from Cameroon, recounts her memories of rape and abuse at the hands of relatives supposed to provide her with affection and education. “My father placed me in the care of my older sister when I was only two because she was not having children. But he brought me back home when I was 16 or 17 because all was not well: I was badly mistreated. My sister’s co-wife and her children, who were older than me, used to beat me up severely. As soon as my sister left for work I’d be at their mercy. “Before going to school I had to clean up the whole house. When I’d come home I had to wait until everyone else had finished eating before I could have supper. If there was nothing left I’d go to bed on an empty stomach or go to see if the neighbours had any leftovers. “My sister’s husband used to beat her, so she left, but she couldn’t take me with her. She left me alone there for a month which is when they broke my forefinger. Another time they hit me on the head with a hammer. I never said anything to my brother-in-law because I was afraid he’d hit me more." The sore festered because nobody gave me medicine. When my sister returned there was pus and maggots in the wound. She asked me what had happened but I told her I’d fallen down on the stairs. I was afraid of a new beating if I told the truth. I only told my sister two years ago what had really happened. She cried because she knew I had been brutalised, but not to that extent. “When I was eight years old, my brother-in-law’s little brother, who was 18, used to wash us. One day he raped me. I didn’t want to tell anyone but my sister noticed that I couldn’t walk. After that, she asked for a divorce because she believed her husband was an accomplice to the fact, but he refused. It isn’t easy to divorce and my parents wouldn’t have been able to pay back the dowry. “I suffered a lot and still do. My head hurts when I remember all this. I cannot braid my hair properly and am still disgusted by sexual relations. "But I have two children now and live with their father. At first it wasn’t easy because he didn’t understand what was blocking me. But we talked about it and he understood that he must be patient and not upset me. When I see those who hurt me at family reunions my scars start to hurt again.” hb/ccr/ss