"The condom broke and I got pregnant"

"I am a young, 26-year-old woman. My name is Olivia, but I would like to be known as Hope, because I've learned that there is no name without meaning.

I am an activist in the DREAM programme [an AIDS prevention and treatment initiative], in Machava [in the south of the country]. After having lost the hope of living, I'm here to help others live. I am infected with HIV and at times I feel guilty about this. I have always had protected sex since discovering that I was HIV-positive. But I learned first hand that the only way to be sure of protection is abstinence.

Two years after finding out I was infected, I became pregnant. I was certain that that would never happen because we always used condoms. But that one time the condom broke! I became desperate because I know that getting pregnant, in my state, is risky.

I spoke with my husband, he is also HIV-positive. I told him that I hadn't had my period that month. He advised me to take a pregnancy test: it was positive.

I told a friend of mine what happened. Her first reaction was to suggest I get an abortion, but my husband told me: 'The important thing is to have faith in God and let the baby come into the world." I also believed that it would be better that way. Clearly it wasn't an easy decision, but it pained me to think about not being able to have a child with my husband, what happiness a child would bring our marriage!

It's true that we already had three children: two are my husband's, and one my own. Only my son, who is now 11 years old, lives with us. We are still building our house and when it's completed the two girls will move in with us. Now they live with one of their grandmothers, but they spend vacations with us ...

I am almost completing the ninth month of my pregnancy and I hope that everything goes well. I want to be a concrete testament to vertical prevention therapy. If my baby is a boy, he will have his father's name, Issufo, if it is a girl, she will be Leticia."